By Maya Lavender
It’s that time of year again! The time when I am going to guide us all in a really important group exercise, and you will indulge me please. Close your eyes, and picture what a goblin looks like. Can you do it? How about a ghoul? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Every Halloween season we are told to beware of them, but literally what even are they? And if they’re truly so spooky, then I wanna see!!! I have frankly had plenty of the creepies and the crawlies. And once you’ve heard one bump in the night, you’ve heard them all. I’m so tired of the ghosts and the witches and the demons. They’re so overplayed and it shows in their attitude. I just want to meet a goblin and/or ghoul.
No preference, I’m not picky. I just think it would be super cool, you know. I want to feel the abject terror of opening my refrigerator and there being a goblin in there. Oh, and what I would not give to get in my car, and have the engine not start after several attempts, so I pop the hood. And what do I find in there? A ghoul, of course! And I’ll have no choice but to say, “How ghoulish!” And the ghoul would make a little ghoul noise. But that will never happen, because we live in a terrible and unfair world.
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