By Megan Brien
Shock waves reverberated through the populace of Bard College this past week after an updated list of rankings hit princetonreview.com/college-rankings/ on Friday afternoon. Having held the coveted first place spot for five years running, Bard has cultivated quite the reputation for its rampant dinner party culture. First reported by Onion News in 2011, the school’s so-called “epidemic” reached unprecedented heights in the fall of 2015, when it is said that one could not walk through campus for more than five minutes without hearing the splash of pouring wine or the whoosh of salad spinners. Since then, the scene of wining and dining toned down substantially after a student was sent to the hospital, their condition resulting from a harrowing incident involving a panini press and a “funky” batch of home brew. The school now sits at fourth place, filing in just behind Swarthmore College and Wesleyan University, and giving its previous frontrunner space to Middlebury College. Despite this recent upset, the students of Bard are confident in their ability to push their way back to the top. “Dinner party culture is integral to Bard’s social scene,” says sophomore Cayley Ray, “It’s definitely not going anywhere.”
Comments