By Clare Herzog
With the semester fully underway and student activities in full swing, a hot topic of conversation at the Kline dinner table has arisen: Why’s the shuttle always so late? Well, theydies and themtlemen, after interviewing our new shuttle drivers, we’ve got answers!
“Bard Transportation wants to give the best experience to travelling students, and that means giving them the best views,” said Shuttle Driver Mikhail Gorbachev, “What with Bard being on the Hudson River, possibly the cleanest and most beautiful river in the Northern Hemisphere, we decided to take the administration’s beliefs in learning through experience to heart and give the students what they want.”
And boy does Gorby deliver. Now featured on the shuttle’s main route between Robbins and Kline is the bottom of the Hudson River -- a far walk for students, but not a problem for the Bard Bullet to put the pedal to the metal all the way down Cruger Island Road.
Gorbachev continued, “the river stop is an exciting and scenic place for students wishing to interact more closely with nature and farther destinations with reasonable convenience. There are so many enlightening and fun activities you can do: scavenge for lost bowls and bongs; float on your back in the 55-foot PCB abyss, or -- and this is my favorite activity -- lie down at the bottom.”